Who is God?

I come to the realization that nothing I have is my own quite often.  If you’re asking how someone realizes something more than once, I am not at all surprised—merely proven.  It’s quite simple, really: I am human.  We are forgetful, and our imperfect natures cannot retain the significance of anything without having to be reminded.  I am proven by this because we all realize things over and over again; we all forget things over and over again—and this is just another instance of you, who asked how realization can take place more than once, forgetting that this is a human quality.  For example, anyone who has seen the ocean’s waves or a cave’s crystal formations or a mountaintop’s view knows that these things are the finest statements of nature’s beauty.  So why is it that whenever you visit these places again, you are filled with a new sense of awe?  It’s because we’ve forgotten the significance of their beauty.  We have to realize their beauty again.  Or another example: you watch a movie that really moves you (I don’t know if you ever noticed this before—but MOVies should MOVE you, that should be their purpose, and if they don’t then they are pointless) but you don’t watch it for a long time.  Then when you watch it again, it strikes you deeper, and you say things like “I forgot how good that is.”  This is why we must realize things more than once.

But enough of why I realized this—the point is the realization itself, not its possibility.  I’ve realized again that nothing I have is mine.  Everything I possess is no longer mine, but God’s.  Because if God is not my King, my Master, and my Father, then he cannot be my Savior either.  If I don’t give everything to him, I can’t have everything he has to offer me.  So nothing I have is really mine—that includes money, time, talent, thought…and even this blog.  So when I realized this, I asked God what he would have me write about, since it’s his anyway.

I think a lot of people have a misconception of who God is.  I think I’m part of that “lot of people.”  I think many of us struggle with the idea of a relationship with God, because we don’t really have a solid perception of who he is.  We don’t know how to relate.  I think a lot of Christians are trying to seek God blindly, without any idea of what they’re seeking.  And I’m forced to ask the questions, Can we have any understanding of who God is in this life?  Can I know the identity of God?  Would I be able to seek God further and further dedicate my life to him if I knew more what he is like?  Is it possible to understand why my soul craves God, or is it something too far beyond my limited understanding?  Will I ever grasp what it means to call God “Father” and “Friend?”

Who is God, really?

I’m going on a journey.  At the end of this journey, I will know who God is—I will have talked with him, laughed with him, cried with him, prayed with him, traveled with him, and shared my deepest secrets with him.  He will be my father, my friend, my Lord, and my lover.  I love him with everything that I am, and I have no doubts.  But for God to truthfully be all those things for me, all at once and all the time, instead of just a very real but untouchable embodiment of love and grace?  Think of it this way: there is a great president, who loves the people and gives them everything they need, and whose only concern is keeping them safe and cared for, and spends all his time with the people.  He is perhaps the greatest man ever to live because of his kindness, his compassion, and his understanding.  You know he is real, and you know how great he is, and you understand all the things he does for you, and all your trust is in him.  You spend all your time speaking of him, and praising him, and doing your best to emulate him.  But would you not be an even better representation of him if he were your best friend?  If he were your closest and most intimate confidant?  Would you not love him more if you knew him better?

God is not distant.  He is not something we have to blindly pursue.  We can be absolutely sure of everything he does, and everything he is.  Our souls desperately long to know him more and more, to go deeper and further into this relationship that surpasses any other.  And we will never reach its end—we always will be able to push ourselves even more, to go deeper and further, because there is no limit to God; there will always be more to learn, to understand, and to love.

I’m on a journey, and I pray that you are too.